We Can Learn to Love Again
by LogicallyStupid
Summary: He will never be satisfied... I will never be satisfied... What happens when the Maid Of Honor and the Best Man fall for the Groom? At the same time one of them is sick and that just makes things worse. Then the elevator is broken and heels suck. One really interesting wedding, or for two people, lack thereof


Tears rolled down my cheeks as I finished my speech, the speech I wished someone had written for me. I could never tell Eliza but, I wanted to marry Alex. I wanted it with all my heart. The problem with most wishes, is that they never come true.

I knew this when I saw Eliza's face the day we met him. I knew it when I saw her unable to take her eyes off his handsome face. It was certain when he asked her out just before we left.

My heart ached whenever I dreamt of what could've been if I had the courage to talk to him instead of letting Eliza seduce him. My heart raced and my breathing grew erratic when he entered the room. My lips longed to meet his, but it could never happen. Not as long as he married my dear sister.

I hid my face as I walked back to the table where I'd sit beside our other sister, Peggy. I knew my mascara was dripping down my face like melted wax, but I couldn't bare to let them know what I was truly thinking.

As my mother and father walked up to the podium to perform their speech, it became impossible to not full out cry. "Peg, if Liza is looking for me tell her I'm out getting some air." My younger sister nodded, she knew very vaguely how I felt. Vaguely was all she'd ever know, I trusted her but, not with a secret this large.

I felt my dress swish around my ankles as I exited. The only noise I registered was the sound of my heels clicking against the tile as I made my way into the hallway. I just wanted to break down in tears and spend the rest of the night on the balcony but, I could never do that to Eliza.

I stopped halfway when I heard crying. Someone was on the balcony already. I should just re-apply my makeup and head back to the reception but, something felt odd and I really wanted to be away from the party for a while.

So I continued through the hallway until it hit the balcony. I didn't know what I was expecting but, it definitely wasn't the Best Man full on in tears with half-empty a bottle of red wine. He was looking out over the balcony as he took a sip from the bottle.

I didn't know him well but, at the very least I knew his name. "John? What are you doing out here? You have to give your speech in a bit." When he heard me he tensed and sunk to the floor of the balcony, still not speaking. Just crying.

I sat beside him as he took another sip from the bottle. "You gonna share that?" I asked teasingly but, honestly I wanted some myself. He slid the bottle over to me and I took a sip. "So, what are you doing out here-"

"Cut the shit Angelica, what do you want?" His voice was harsh, his words angry but, there was a type of… sadness in his voice. I couldn't really put my finger on it. "If you don't want anything then can you leave me alone?" Tears continued to run down his cheeks as he curled in on himself.

Something was clearly wrong with him. That much I knew but, what exactly? From what I was told Alex is his best friend so why is he spending the most important night of Alexander's life alone, with a bottle of wine on the balcony? Could it be for the same reason as me?

"I just wanted some air, it's hard to watch your sister get married to the man you love." As soon as the words escaped my lips I felt a huge wave of relief pass over me. I think he felt the same way too. His eyes grew large and he looked at me for the first time that night.

"You too?" His voice was quiet and broken. I could tell he was even more torn apart about it than I was. I motioned for him to slide over and he did. He started sobbing into my shoulder. "Angelica…. God I thought I was the only one."

I rubbed his shoulder sympathetically. Then I felt my tears coming. I wiped mine away and took another sip of the wine. We sat there for a few minutes until eventually he cried himself to sleep. It was the first time I noticed how exhausted he was, there were bags under his eyes and his skin was flushed. I felt his forehead and it was burning.

I slid him off of me and I snuck away to see if I could find something to take his temperature. If I could find someone who worked here maybe they'd have a thermometer. I found a woman she appeared to be a part of the waitstaff. She noticed me approaching with a raised eyebrow.

"Excuse me miss, do you have a thermometer?" She looked confused but nodded and ran into a room and returned with a full on first aid kit. "Thanks," I clutched it to my chest and tried to run in heels, emphasis on tried. It was more like I stumbled awkwardly through the hall.

I entered the balcony once more to see John right where I'd left him. I slid the thermometer out of the box. It was the kind that you'd press the button and run it across their forehead, so I did it. 38 degrees celsius. (100.4 Fahrenheit you Americans) That's a fever all right.

I woke him up and helped him stand. Most of his weight was supported by me as we made our way to where the reception was held. It was hard to push open the door with only my left hand but, somehow I succeeded. No one was really paying attention to the door, for that I was thankful. My one goal was to get John out of there.

Then I made my way up to the podium John at my side. I took a deep breath, cleared my throat and explained what happened and what was going to happen to the best of my ability. "Hello everyone, I know I already said my speech but, John here has a fever and I'm going to take him home. I apologize for this inconvenience."

Looks of worry crossed everyone's faces in the sea of people, especially Lafayette, Hercules and Alexander. I knew what I was doing was selfish but, I didn't want to watch the man I love be in love with my sister anymore tonight.

On the way out we were stopped by Alex and Eliza. My sister spoke to me while Alex spoke to John. "You know you can get someone else to drive him home Ange, you can stay if you want to."

I gave my sister the best smile I could at the time. "Liza, it's alright I don't mind. Plus, everyone and their mother is drunk in there and I'm not letting a minor drive him." I wrapped my arms around her. "I love you sis, I'll see you tomorrow morning at the latest."

It turned out Alex had a similar conversation with John. He and I left the building but we didn't get all the way out before Eliza called out to us. "Get better soon!"

I smiled and continued down the hallway. John was barely awake, but he was managing for now. We found my car easily, I wasn't planning on drinking much so I'd probably just carpool people home when the time came. Of course that idea was down the drain now… oh well it's the thought that counts.

I sat John in the front seat. He did his own seatbelt, which I was thankful for. There was no way that I could do it in this dress, while beautiful it was extremely unpractical. I stumbled around on the uneven ground in my heels. Those were gonna go as soon as I got home.

I settled into the driver's seat and began to drive. It was quiet just the noise of the road and the wind passing by. "Angelica, you don't have to do this." His voice was hoarse and now that she thought about it she could hear how sick he was in his voice earlier. "I would've been able to fake it I've been faking it all night."

Something about that angered her, he knew he was sick and he just continued on like nothing was wrong. "I do have to do it, you're sick and I can't be there anymore tonight. How are you even sick anyway? According to Alex your immune system is great."

He sighed, which turned into a cough very quickly. "I having been getting much sleep lately or, doing anything really." His voice was quiet. I looked over at him he was leaning on the door.

I took one hand off the steering wheel to rub his shoulder. I put it back on as soon as possible and put my eyes back on the road. "I know the feeling, I've just been keeping the act up for Peggy and Eliza. I couldn't worry them before her big day."

When I got no reply I glanced over at him again, he was asleep. He probably needed it. I drove in silence I'd probably just take him to my apartment that I shared with my sisters. Peggy and Eliza have been staying at our family home though so, it was likely they wouldn't be home tonight.

When I arrived at my apartment I sat there in silence for a few minutes. Then I reached over and woke him up, the odds of me being able to successfully carry him in these heels were slim.

We stumbled into the apartment building and never have I ever been more thankful that a bunch of kids live in this apartment meaning that they all go to bed before ten o'clock.

Then I noticed the first problem, the elevator was broken again. I glared at it and kicked my heels off. My apartment was on the second floor thankfully but, that didn't mean it was any harder dragging John up the stairs.

I really wanted to get out of this wretched stairwell, okay that was dramatic. In my defence, it had been a long night. When we got to the apartment I grabbed the key out of my pocket that I'd sewn into the dress.

The apartment was large enough for the two of us, Eliza had moved out months ago. It had two bedrooms one of which that Eliza and Peggy used to share. The main room was small but big enough for what we need it.

I lead John of two our spare bed. It used to be Eliza's but it hadn't been for such a long time. When he was lying down I left to grab Advil, a glass of water and a wet cloth. That was really all I could do for now.

I took his curly hair down and left the room. I entered my own room. It was a decent room and I was proud of it. I changed into an old sweater and sweatpants. It wasn't what I'd usually wear but, whatever. I grabbed a spare makeup wipe and wiped it all off my face. I'd never been big on makeup that was more Peggy's game.

I went back into the other room to see him sitting up and staring out the window the cloth was held tightly in his hand and the Advil and water gone. I folded my arms and leaned in the doorway. "You should sleep." I said that in my most sincere voice, which was surprising most knew me as the feisty sister. Peggy was the sarcastic one and Eliza was the kind one.

"I can't." I entered the room and sat on Peggy's bed. He was shaking as more tears fell. "I can't." He repeated. "You should be out there at your sister's wedding not stuck here with me because I can't take care of myself."

I clicked my tongue and folded my arms once more. "I know you're capable of taking care of yourself but, you're sick. Everything is harder when you're sick." I looked away from him. "And the wedding thing… I can't stay there I know you couldn't either. You being sick just granted us an escape."

It was horrible that I so desperately wanted to get away from my sister's wedding but, I couldn't stay there and not cry. During the ceremony my tears were understandable. During the reception however, that would be an issue.

"Eliza will forgive me and Alex will too." I said quietly. "We'll find someone else someday, John." I moved over to Eliza's old bed and sat beside him. "I promise."

This seemed to be all the reassurance he needed. He laid down and I left the room. We will find somebody, we can move on. We have to.

For Alex.


End file.
